04.20.2008 - Waiting and Praying

From Julian's COTA Journal.

I sat with Julian during his dialysis session on Friday morning, which, for the most part, was uneventful. It took a little while to get the machine going before they could actually hook him up, but once things were underway, it was smooth sailing. As the dialysis nurses like to say, “boring dialysis is good dialysis.”

Yesterday, we took Julian into San Francisco, to Fisherman’s Wharf. It was super busy up there, but fun nonetheless. We had lunch at Boudin, one of our gastronomical happy places, followed by Julian’s very first trolly car ride (not to be confused with the San Francisco cable car – we’ll do that some other time), and a ride down Pacific Coast Highway to Half Moon Bay before heading inland. It was a great family time, and although I only get to see my family half-a-week at a time, we’re making good memories when we’re together. And if you have to wait somewhere for an organ transplant, you could do a lot worse than central California.

So, now that the course has been set regarding Julian’s urological issues, he’s been reactivated on the organ transplant list, and may very well be near the top of that list. Meanwhile, our friend Cheryl is undergoing the final rounds of testing in the next couple of weeks. It all seems like we may be getting down to the wire, and ultimately we want the best possible kidney for our son. Obviously, it’s impossible for Stacy and me to tell which kidney is the best one, so we’re praying that God figure that part out.

It’s a difficult thing to pray for – a donated organ. If we end up with an organ donated by a deceased person (“cadaveric” in organ transplant parlance), it means that someone’s life just ended, and that’s how you received the organ. Which is fine – I checked the little box on my driver’s license to donate my organs in the event of my untimely demise: it’s not like I’d need them once I’m gone. Obviously, none of “all that” is in our control, but it still feels strange somehow.

Stacy recently purchased a cross pendant for a necklace that has the entire Lord’s Prayer inscribed on it. She says it reminds her that when she doesn’t know what or how to pray, Jesus gave us that as a starting point. So even though it’s confusing sometimes, knowing what exactly we should pray for, it’s comforting to know that we can always go back to “Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name…” In the end, Julian is God’s child, and we have every confidence that he’ll take care of his own.